When it feels safer to “play dead”.

Most of us have heard of the fight or flight response — that surge of energy when the body senses danger and gets ready to battle or run. But there’s a third, less talked about reaction: freeze. Sometimes, when life feels overwhelming or escape seems impossible, the nervous system hits the brakes so hard that we shut down. It’s like the body decides, “It’s safer to play dead.”

In this post, we’ll explore what the freeze response really is, why it happens, how Polyvagal Theory helps us understand it, and most importantly, how you can gently shift out of it and reclaim your sense of safety and aliveness.

What Is the Freeze Response?

The freeze response is part of the parasympathetic branch of the autonomic nervous system (ANS). While the parasympathetic system is usually associated with rest, digestion, and calm, it also has a more ancient branch — the dorsal vagal pathway — that triggers shutdown when danger feels inescapable.

In freeze, the body slows everything down:

• Heart rate drops
• Blood pressure lowers
• Breathing becomes shallow
• Muscles lose energy or feel immobilised
• Thoughts become foggy or disconnected

It’s not a conscious choice — it’s an automatic survival strategy.

Why the Body Chooses Freeze

The nervous system is wired to keep us alive at all costs. If fighting or fleeing seem impossible, the body turns to immobilisation — conserving energy, numbing sensation, and creating distance from overwhelming experience.

From an evolutionary perspective, freeze has survival value. Think of an animal “playing dead” to avoid a predator’s attention. Humans do the same thing, though often in more subtle ways: zoning out, dissociating, or shutting down emotionally.

Polyvagal Theory and Freeze

Dr. Stephen Porges’ Polyvagal Theory gives us a helpful lens for understanding freeze. The vagus nerve, which runs from brainstem to gut, has two key branches:

• Ventral vagal complex → safety, social connection, calm.
• Dorsal vagal complex → shutdown, immobilization, freeze.

When safety cues are present, we live mostly in ventral vagal — connected, resilient, and open. But if danger is sensed and fight/flight isn’t possible, the nervous system shifts down the “ladder” into dorsal vagal freeze.

This explains why freeze can feel so absolute: you’re not just calm, you’re immobilised.

Trauma and the Freeze Response

Trauma often plays a central role in freeze. If, in the past, your body learned that fighting back or escaping was impossible, it may default to freeze much more quickly in the present.

This isn’t a conscious choice — it’s the body’s learned survival wisdom. The challenge is that when freeze becomes a chronic state, it keeps us stuck. We may hold beliefs like:

• “I’m powerless.”
• “It’s not safe to act.”
• “I don’t have a choice.”

These trauma-imprinted beliefs can reinforce the freeze pattern, keeping us immobilised long after the danger has passed. Healing means gently updating those beliefs as you teach your nervous system that safety and action are now possible.

Steps to Shift Out of Freeze

Recovering from freeze is about titration — small, gentle steps that coax the system back into safety and connection. Here are some practices that can help:

1. Start With Awareness

Notice the signs of freeze: numbness, fogginess, heavy stillness, feeling “far away.” Naming the state helps you separate from it.

2. Use Micro-Movements

Begin with tiny movements — wiggling fingers, stretching your neck, tapping your feet. Small mobilizations signal to the nervous system that it’s safe to come back online.

3. Gentle Breathwork

Try soft sighs or gradually lengthening your exhale. Big deep breaths can feel overwhelming in freeze, so keep it slow and subtle.

4. Orient to Safety

Look around the room and name five things you see. This grounds you in the present and reassures the nervous system you are not in danger now.

5. Engage the Social Nervous System

Connect with someone safe, hum, sing softly, or place your hand on your chest while speaking kindly to yourself. These cues activate the ventral vagal branch — the pathway of safety and connection.

6. Belief Reset

When you feel a bit more grounded, gently challenge freeze-based beliefs. Ask yourself:

• Is this threat still happening, or is it in the past?
• What’s one small choice I can make right now?
• If I were safe and capable, what would I believe instead?

Final Thoughts

Freeze isn’t a failure — it’s a brilliant survival response. The key is learning how to recognise it, respect its origins, and slowly guide yourself back to safety, connection, and agency. With time, trauma integration, and nervous system practises, you can rewrite the old survival patterns and step into a more empowered way of living.

✨ Ready to move from stuck to safe?
My 6-week Nervous System Reset Programme is designed to help you regulate your nervous system, learn to access safety in your body, and build lasting emotional resilience. Find out more ➝ HERE