We’re all faced with decisions every day—big ones like whether to stay in a job or relationship, and small ones like how to spend our evening. Most of us assume we’re choosing based on logic or practicality, but underneath the surface, there’s something deeper guiding us: our core values.
Core values are the internal compass points that shape how we think, feel, and act. They influence our priorities, define what “success” means to us, and help us align our choices with who we really are. When you live in line with your values, life feels authentic and fulfilling. When you don’t, you may feel stuck, conflicted, or like something’s missing—even if everything looks fine on paper.
What Are Core Values?
Core values are the fundamental beliefs and principles that drive your behaviour. They aren’t goals (which can change over time) or skills (which you can learn). Instead, they are your deeply held truths about what really matters to you.
Some examples of core values:
- Freedom
- Connection
- Growth
- Security
- Adventure
- Integrity
- Creativity
- Contribution
These values act like a personal North Star. For instance, if “freedom” is a core value, you may feel deeply uncomfortable in rigid structures or micromanaged environments. If “connection” is a core value, relationships and community will always come before achievement.
💡 Journal Prompt: What words come to mind when you think about the kind of person you most admire? Which of those qualities feel essential to you too?
Why Do Core Values Matter?
- Clarity in decision-making
When you know your values, choices become clearer. Instead of agonising over “Should I do this or that?” you can ask, “Which option is most aligned with my values?”
💡 Journal Prompt: Think of a recent decision that felt easy and natural. What value was honored in that choice? Now think of a decision that felt hard or draining—what value was being compromised?
- Authenticity and self-trust
Living according to your values reduces the gap between who you are and how you show up. That builds self-trust and confidence. - Better relationships
Values shape how we connect. Understanding yours—and respecting others’—improves communication, sets healthy boundaries, and creates stronger connections. - Resilience in tough times
When life gets messy, values anchor you. They remind you of what’s most important, helping you navigate stress, change, and uncertainty.
💡 Journal Prompt: What values have helped you get through a tough time in the past? How did they give you strength?
How to Locate Your Core Values
Finding your values isn’t about pulling random words off a list. It’s about self-inquiry and observation.
Here are three simple but powerful ways to uncover yours:
1. Reflect on peak moments
Think of times in your life when you felt most alive, fulfilled, or proud. What values were being honored in those moments?
💡 Journal Prompt: When have you felt most “yourself”? Describe what you were doing, who you were with, and why it felt so meaningful.
2. Notice your triggers
Pay attention to what frustrates or angers you. Often, triggers reveal when one of your values is being violated. If broken promises infuriate you, honesty or reliability could be a core value.
💡 Journal Prompt: What situations make you feel instantly irritated, angry, or disappointed? What value might be clashing in those moments?
3. Ask yourself “What matters most?”
Strip away roles, expectations, and shoulds. Imagine you had to simplify life down to five things that matter above all else. What would they be?
💡 Journal Prompt: If everything in your life was taken away tomorrow, what five things would you fight to keep?
Bringing It All Together
Once you’ve identified your core values, write them down, define what they mean to you, and use them as a filter for your choices. You may find that you’ve been living by other people’s values—or even conflicting ones. The more aligned you become, the more energy, clarity, and direction you’ll have.
💡 Journal Prompt: Write down your top five values and describe in your own words what each one means. Then ask yourself: Am I living in alignment with these values daily? Where am I out of sync?
✨ Ready to get unstuck and live a life aligned with your deepest values? This is the work I do with my coaching clients every day—helping you strip away the noise, get clear on what matters, and move forward with confidence.
Book a connection call with me HERE to find out more.
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